quote Posted by chris on Aug 16th, 2010 add a comment

Bartlet: You know what we’re starting with tonight?
 Lyman: No, sir.
 Bartlet: Hot pumpkin soup with a cheese gnocchi & chèvre brioche.
 Lyman: Was anything you just said… food?

— From an episode of The West Wing

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The truth hurts

Posted by chris on Aug 6th, 2010 add a comment


Cookies from Gregory’s Gourmet Desserts

After 24 years of diligent practice and non-stop training, I know how to tell when I’ve had enough cookies: When there’s none left. And the bag, box or bakery is empty. And there’s chocolatey, sugary, sometimes-snickerdoodley pain in my stomach.

Previously on Cut & Taste

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A sign of things to come

Posted by chris on Jul 15th, 2010 1 comment


Photo by Will Duncan, who was thoroughly unimpressed & unsatisfied with the shot from my iPhone camera

I printed some helpful tips for our fridge at ENTP. Because we like cold drinks on hot days. And in the words of wise investor Warren Buffet, “Someone’s sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago.”

But wait — there’s more! Earlier this year, I made a sign to remind people to take their leftovers home. It hangs on our office door — the last thing you see before you leave.

No need to thank me. Please, keep your seats. Women, refrain from throwing underpants on the stage. I’m just a man trying to help. Okay, maybe I’ll take just one pair of underpants.

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The right thing

Posted by chris on Jul 2nd, 2010 2 comments

It's Hard To Do The Right Thing When There Is Syrup involved
By Erin Hanson

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It’s lunchtime somewhere

Posted by chris on Jun 9th, 2010 add a comment

  • Courtenay: stepping out for “lunch”
  • Will: At 4pm!
  • Chris: i haven’t had breakfast. schedules are for losers.

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quote Posted by chris on May 24th, 2010 add a comment

I want the biggest cheeseburger you got. Instead of salad, I want fries. Instead of fruit, I want chili fries.

—Jay Pritchett from an episode of Modern Family

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When Free Snacks at the Office Go Bad

Posted by chris on May 24th, 2010 add a comment

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Hidden MSG

Posted by chris on May 15th, 2010 add a comment

  • Chris: i’m so full off this korean bbq
  • Chris: i don’t know why i kept eating it
  • Seyoung: it’s the msg
  • Chris: the sign said no msg
  • Seyoung: they meant they don’t want you sending messages
  • Seyoung: about the fact they use msg

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Corkboard

Posted by chris on Apr 4th, 2010 4 comments


From Jill and Dan’s kitchen. Awesome.

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quote Posted by chris on Mar 23rd, 2010 3 comments

Doctor, when can I eat hard cheeses again?

—Liz Lemon from an episode of 30 Rock (“Future Husband”)

I almost said these exact words. Recently, while taking antibiotics to combat an illness, the doctor ordered me to avoid two things: dairy and sunlight. No problem. Who needs dairy and sunlight? Besides well-balanced human beings who enjoy life and feel happiness.

But I like not being dead, so I follow directions. I shield myself from dairy and hide from the sun, hoping this is not how vampires are born. Occasionally, I crawl out of bed to eat. No butter. No cheese. No dairy of any kind. In the dark. A melange of medication for dessert. Tiramisu is played out, anyway.

This week, I finished the last of the antibiotics. Now, I can finish the last of the ice cream.

This blog post is dedicated to my dear friend, Jill. Most co-workers, friends and frenemies sent me traditional “get well” messages. But Jill threatened me on Facebook:

so, can I remove your blog from my RSS feed? because it hasn’t been updated in months. what, was your level of food snobbery not welcome in portland? have you started putting A1 on your well done filets?

Her kind words touched me in ways I can not describe. A cold day, devoid of sunlight was brightened by the warmth of this message. I credit my quick recovery to Jill’s boundless compassion. Fancypants Ivy League educated medical professionals will claim that prescription drugs and modern medicine are the real heroes, but I — and everyone reading this — knows the truth.

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